Need
by SuzMonster
Summary: This is slash of the Harry Potter/Draco Malfoy variety. Please read responsibly.


Harry woke with his head cushioned on his lover's chest. Even though he wasn't in Gryffindor Tower, he immediately knew where he was. He had slept here most nights over the last six months. He knew this morning was different, though, and his heart clenched. He felt his boyfriend stir and knew that he needed to tell him sooner, rather than later.

"Morning baby," Draco said, his usual drawl laced with drowsiness.

Harry didn't say anything. He just leaned up for a kiss. Draco could feel the tension; it was almost radiating off Harry. Harry began to move, slowly, almost apprehensively, away from Draco.

"What's going on?" Draco asked, concerned. "What's wrong?"

Harry avoided his eyes. "Draco," he began, but trailed off. He took a deep breath and started again. "I want to tell them." He didn't need to elaborate. Draco knew exactly to what and whom he was referring.

"I don't think it's a good idea," Draco replied. His voice was stern if not commanding.

"But you promised," Harry answered, his voice whining, almost pleading with Draco.

Draco sighed. "I know, but-"

Harry interrupted him, his voice rising. "It's been three months, Draco. You promised me after Voldemort we'd tell them, but it's been three months!"

"Harry, I… I just don't think it's a good idea."

Harry looked crushed and turned to the window to hide his face from Draco, who was rising from their bed. '_His bed,'_ Harry reminded himself.

"Draco, I love you," he started, "but I can't do this anymore. All the lying and the hiding and the sneaking around. It's making me crazy."

Harry stopped, waiting for Draco to cut in, but he never did. So Harry continued.

"I'm sorry, Draco. I knew you'd feel this way. I should have told you last night, but I didn't. Just in case." He spoke to the window. He still couldn't face Draco.

"In case what, baby?" He still hadn't grasped the gravity of the situation.

"Incase I never get to feel you inside me again. Incase it was our last time. I just needed one more night. I'm sorry"

He paused again, then turned around.

"You have a week to decide, Draco. A week to figure out how important I am to you. I just want to tell my family. Ron, Hermione, Sirius, Remus. It's not that much to ask. If you're not ready in a week, then it's over."

"But…" Draco sputtered, "But I love you."

Harry ignored him. There were tears in his eyes as he finished dressing, gathered his things and left Draco's rooms. He was scared. So scared that Draco wouldn't be able to face his fears and that he would have to go on without him.

Harry wasn't sure if he could do it. He relied on Draco for support he couldn't find anywhere else. With Draco, he knew he was loved, he knew he had someone to lean on. Without him, he had to stand alone, and it was so long since he had to do that. He wasn't sure that he could.

He wandered almost aimlessly for a quarter of an hour, before he realized he wasn't going anywhere and headed to the Great Hall. If he didn't get there soon, Ron and Hermione would be worried.

He walked into the Hall and took his customary seat across from his best friends, who had begun dating the previous summer.

"Harry, what's wrong," Hermione asked immediately.

"Yea mate, you look like hell," Ron added, between mouthfuls. Hermione hit him.

"It's nothing guys, don't worry," Harry replied. He hated lying to his friends, but he'd gotten used to it. He and Draco had gotten together during the war and they didn't divulge their relationship for Draco's safety. They had agreed they would tell their friends when it was all over. Since Draco no longer had friends other than his godfather, and he didn't fancy telling Severus he was with Harry Potter, he had reneged on the deal.

The week continued in a similar fashion, with Harry sullenly attending classes and doing homework, all the while maintaining an apathetic air. His friends were worried but knew Harry would come to them in his own time and so they gave him space.

He did everything he could to avoid Draco, and managed pretty well, except during potions. Draco was sitting one row ahead of him and to his left, which gave Harry a perfect view. He couldn't concentrate at all, and blew up his cauldron. Snape yelled and took points, but at least Harry was allowed to leave. He had to go to the hospital wing so his wounds could be healed.

Finally, it was the following Wednesday, one week since the ultimatum. Harry cried himself to sleep Tuesday night, the first time he allowed himself to cry since his talk with Draco. He was so scared he'd be without Draco. The previous week had been hell. He couldn't face another one like it.

He approached the Head Boy chambers and spoke the password, hoping it hadn't been changed. He was granted entrance. He walked in and immediately spotted Draco sitting on the couch. He too looked like he hadn't been sleeping.

Harry approached Draco and looked into his eyes searchingly. Neither spoke. Neither knew how to start. Finally, after several minutes, Draco began.

"Harry, I love you. You know I do. But I can't. I just can't tell them . You don't understand."

"Understand what, Draco? What is it? Just tell me. Please, Draco, I need you," Harry all but pleaded with him.

"I'm sorry, baby, I can't. I just… I can't."

Harry fled. Eventually he found himself in front of the Room of Requirement. He entered, knowing that no one would be able to find him; he'd been very specific. His knees gave way just as a couch appeared behind him. He curled up on it and cried.

A week passed, then two. Both Harry and Draco moved like zombies; sleep, eat, class, eat, study, eat, sleep, repeat. Hermione and Ron were becoming more and more worried. They were headed down to dinner in the Great Hall. They had resolved to confront Harry tonight. Enough was enough.

In front of the Hall they were stopped, though.

"Potter, can I have a word?" a familiar voice drawled, cool and collected as ever, only the bags under his eyes betraying his haughty demeanor.

Ron stood firm beside Harry, ready to defend his best friend. Hermione looked from one to the other and for a moment her eye shown knowingly.

"It's okay guys," he told them, "I'll be right in."

Hermione pulled Ron away and they entered the Hall.

"What is it, Draco?" Harry asked tiredly.

Draco stepped closer. Harry couldn't bring himself to back away. Each could feel the other's breath on his face.

"Harry… I've… missed you," he murmured.

"I miss you, too. But that's not the point. I…" he moved fractionally closer, "I can't do this," he said abruptly. He stepped back and turned to leave. He felt Draco's hand on his shoulder. He briefly turned back.

"Please, baby." The plea in Draco's voice shattered his already broken heart.

Harry vaguely shook his head. He opened the door to the Great Hall and walked in as confidently as he could. He could hear Draco following behind him and used all his resolve to ignore him, tears shining in his eyes. He reached up to wipe them away as he heard that drawl he'd grown to love.

"But Harry," his voice rose above those of the other students' and many heads turned their way. Harry stopped moving and turned toward Draco. They could see the sadness in each other's eyes. Draco walked over to him. His eyes momentarily scanned the Great Hall as he took a deep breath.

"But Harry," he repeated, a little more quietly. "I love you."

Harry's eyes widened as a hush fell over the hall. For what seemed like hours but was merely seconds no one said anything as everyone stared at the supposed enemies. Then Harry moved . In an instant he was in Draco's arms. This broke the silence, but neither noticed as their lips crashed together for the first time in weeks.

Together they turned and left the hall. They had more important business to attend to.

Author's Notes:

Okay, so this was the first fictional story I've ever written, ever! I know it's not amazing and I also know it has multiple clichés. But I figured, what better way to start? If you have the time, I would enjoy hearing (reading, actually) your thoughts on the story, which was written about a year ago on in October of 2007.


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